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YouTube transcript

Auto-Tune the News #2: pirates. drugs. gay marriage.

Languages available: en

transcript:
Perhaps the Constitution envisions certain one-size fits all solutions... Booorrrring! I hear a foghorn! Boorrrrinnng! Élegislature override a gubernatorial veto... Guboringital! I--I'm not feeling any... romance between us right now. You gotta do it like this: Shawtayee! Ready, set, go! This was a pretty remarkable week on the gay marriage front. -First of all, to have a state like Iowa -Whatchoo tryna say about Iowa? - Not the east coast state... - East coast! - Not the left coast state... - Left coast! In a decision written by a republican appointee. Shawty, now you soundin so fine! Give me your number, we can bump and grind. Talkin about politics all night. Leavin the club in the mornin light. If we get carried away (mornin light...) we might get gay-married today. We just heard from some of our viewers who strongly support legalizing marijuana. Shawtayee, 5 of those calls was from me. Do you think we should legalize pot alone or all drugs, including heroin, cocaine, and meth? My brain says no, but my body says yes! I'm an angry gorilla. I heard you needed me. (ooh oh ah ah) Now that Captain Richard Phillips has been successfully rescued, the president has decided to step in front of the spotlight... Ooh, I'm angry! You can't see it, but my forehead's veiny. And even take some credit for authorizing the mission. Well, don't you worry, baby boo. You'll always have an angry gorilla to be angry with you. That's what I do. Just ask Donkey Kong. He's in my crew. At the North Pole, new satellite photos show arctic ice is melting so fast. Oh snap, how fast? Many scientists now predict it will be gone within 30 years. Surely you jest! I'm under cardiac arrest, shawtayee! Some researchers think it could disappear in just six... (Shit!) Without it there could be a snowball effect. (Ohhhh) With temperatures rising even faster, if we all don't take bold action and take it soon, (Yeah) We will find ourselves on very thin ice. (Very thin ice) Very thin ice. Very thin ice. Tell em, Hillary, pirates on very thin ice. These pirates are criminals. They are armed gangs on the sea. That means the ocean The United States does not make concessions. Or ransom payments to pirates. Embarrassing... Sorry guys. Uh, sorry. Uh... I gotta take this. Hello, shawtayee, we can meet up at the mall. (At the mall!) Browse around at the bookstore, mentally ball until we fall. Love you too, grandma. Ah... sorry. Any other questions...? Anybody you wanna buy drugs? From me? Auto-Tune the News (auto-tune the news) Auto-Tune the News (auto-tune the news) Everything sounds better auto-tuned.

auto_transcript:
perhaps the Constitution invision certain one-size-fits-all solution volim here tomorrow morning boldly legislature override a gubernatorial beauty and Loring at I'm not feeling any romance between us right now you gotta do like a sorry many K also supreme remarkable week on the gay marriage fact first man to have a state like I like to try to stay about an hour I think it's cuz he thought I'd like to see it go in decision making by Republican okay sorry got about the excellent that mandolin I hey we just learned that somebody was strongly support legalizing marijuana shot the father does go close to me the we should legalize lololol drugs including heroin cocaine in many places no but I K a man named repair rather do you need me to tell the captain Richard Phillips has been successfully rescue the president had decided to step into the spotlight moves mean you can't even afford it painting you can take some credit for popularizing the nation known to let me tell you who you go the you just study do at the North all you sound like the show Arctic ice is not going to solve passos class many scientists now predictable the thought within thirty years surely you jest on the party God some researchers think the disappear in chess say chair Patti trip to the SL battling temperatures rising much faster if we all don't take old-fashioned and take it sitting here we go by myself on goodnight scary goodnight very night good song these pirates are criminals damn armed gangs saying that means the ocean United States does not make sessions or France payments highness embarrassing side a II the I i've gotta take this pillow the we can meet the love that song the levee to gramma ISRI her any other questions on anybody wanna buy drugs from me model number herself in the world